This was a good week in celebrity n00dz. I guess nipple piercings are really in right now.
Cassie wrote on her Twitter, “IT SEEMS THAT SOMEONE HAS HACKED INTO MY COMPUTER…THAT’S REAL FOUL AND EVIL. NOW STOP ACTING LIKE YOU HAVEN’T SEEN A TITTY BEFORE.”
HAHAHA too bad it wasn’t just tits! I’ve gathered the n00dz to share with you. UH… obviously NSFW.
Hey Girls. Camel Toe might be hot… if you are a Guy!! But who wants to be the one sporting it? Some secrets are meant to be kept.
As we have evolved, hair down there is a thing of the past. As the landing strip and Brazilian wax have become prominent in today’s world, there is no bush for the cush. And though Camel Toe may be a hot topic… it’s not to the gal sporting it!
The Cuchini
Smoothes the ridges of a woman’s mons pubis area.
Keeps undergarments clean.
Can be used with or without underwear.
HAHAHHAHAHA here you go girls, the product of your dreams… the CUCHINI.You know what else works? WEARING UNDERWEAR/PANTS THAT FIT. Ugh, I wonder how many women actually bought this, shit like this blows my mind. Check out their website: https://www.cuchini.com/. It has the worst graphics and color scheme and their main font is Comic Sans, very professional. The last time I saw someone use Comic Sans was sometime in the 90’s by a 12 year old.
The Philadelphia police have confirmed that Kari Ferrell, a.k.a. the Hipster Grifter, was booked into custody last Sunday night at 10:35 p.m., as a fugitive from another jurisdiction. Ferrell is being held at the Riverside Correctional Facility in Northeast Philadelphia, with bail set at $250,000. Ferrell will be held at the Riverside facility until a preliminary hearing scheduled for May 15. Ross said his office is in the process of extraditing her to Utah to face charges.
On Sunday, May 3, she finally agreed to take a bus to Philly. At 9:15 p.m. she said she was sitting on the bus in Manhattan. I immediately called the 6th District police headquarters and told them that a wanted felon with orders for extradition was taking a bus to Chinatown, and that I could help them pick her up. I gave them her case numbers. Then I called the SLCPD and gave them the phone number for the 6th District. When I called the 6th District back, they told me to come down to headquarters to help ID her, so I did.
Officers DeLuca and Green drove me to Chinatown in an unmarked black Explorer. They watched from across the street. When the bus arrived, I waved to Kari to get their attention. I want to say I hugged her, but I was anxious and I don’t remember. I picked her bag out of the luggage storage and started walking behind her. The officers crossed the street and stopped her. I dropped her bag and walked away. They took her aside and questioned her for a moment. She didn’t struggle. I didn’t stay close to hear what they were saying because I wasn’t sure if I wanted her to know it was me who turned her in. Not so much because I cared about her (I didn’t) but because I felt a little cold for betraying someone’s trust.
A squad car came and picked her up. The officers made sure they had my name right, because they couldn’t arrest her without probable cause. An officer gave me a ride home. That was that.
Yeah I know Kari is so two weeks ago and no one cares anymore but I still find this to be hilarious, WHOMP WHOMP. Who wants to take bets on how long till they make a Lifetime movie about her?
Naughty or not?
When you look at a girl, can you tell how slutty she can be? Test your skills here.
I love how many blogs like this keep popping up. COME ON, it’s 2009… if you’re still sending out n00dz, you might as well just post them on your facebook because everyone will know what you look like naked in 24 hrs.
The blog is obviously NSFW. I’m gonna start one of these with dude’s n00dz, so if you’d like to submit yours, email me at …sike.
On Tuesday, State Rep. Betty Brown caused a firestorm during House testimony on voter identification legislation when she said that Asian-Americans should change their names because they’re too hard to pronounce:
“Rather than everyone here having to learn Chinese — I understand it’s a rather difficult language — do you think that it would behoove you and your citizens to adopt a name that we could deal with more readily here?” Brown said.
Brown later told [Organization of Chinese Americans representative Ramey] Ko: “Can’t you see that this is something that would make it a lot easier for you and the people who are poll workers if you could adopt a name just for identification purposes that’s easier for Americans to deal with?”
Yesterday, Brown continued to resist calls to apologize. Her spokesman said that Democrats “want this to just be about race.”
What Betty really means is, you orientals should all go back to where you came from. And NO, she’s not racist! She just thinks everyone should change their names to something like John and Mary… so it’s easier for AMERICANS, DUH! Luckily my parents already named me Sally, I should probably change my last name to something more American though, like Smith! LOL, WHITE PEOPLE.
I’ve had a few customers ask me what my name is and I tell them, “Sally.” At least twice, I’ve had them go, “No! Your real name! What your parents named you.” Of course! My “real” name obviously has to be something Asian because I’m Asian. There’s no way my parents actually named me Sally, right? Ignorance is hilarious. Team America, fuck yeah!
SOUTH PARK MURDERED ME LAST NIGHT AND IT’S PRETTY FUNNY. IT HURTS MY FEELINGS BUT WHAT CAN YOU EXPECT FROM SOUTH PARK! I ACTUALLY HAVE BEEN WORKING ON MY EGO THOUGH. HAVING THE CRAZY EGO IS PLAYED OUT AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE AND CAREER. I USE TO USE IT TO BUILD UP MY ESTEEM WHEN NOBODY BELIEVED IN ME. NOW THAT PEOPLE DO BELIEVE AND SUPPORT MY MUSIC AND PRODUCTS THE BEST RESPONSE IS THANK YOU INSTEAD OF “I TOLD YOU SO!!!” IT’S COOL TO TALK SHIT WHEN YOU’RE RAPPING BUT NOT IN REAL LIFE. WHEN YOU MEET LITTLE WAYNE IN PERSON HE’S THE NICEST GUY FOR EXAMPLE. I JUST WANNA BE A DOPER PERSON WHICH STARTS WITH ME NOT ALWAYS TELLING PEOPLE HOW DOPE I THINK I AM. I NEED TO JUST GET PAST MYSELF. DROP THE BRAVADO AND JUST MAKE DOPE PRODUCT. EVERYTHING IS NOT THAT SERIOUS. AS LONG AS PEOPLE THINK I ACT LIKE A BITCH THIS TYPE OF SHIT WILL HAPPEN TO ME. I GOT A LONG ROAD AHEAD OF ME TO MAKE PEOPLE BELIEVE I’M NOT ACTUALLY A HUGE DOUCHE BUT I’M UP FOR THE CHALLENGE. I’M SURE THE WRITERS AT SOUTH PARK ARE REALLY NICE PEOPLE IN REAL LIFE. THANKS FOR TAKING THE TIME TO DRAW MY CREW. THAT WAS PRETTY FUNNY ALSO!! I’M SURE THERE’S GRAMMATICAL ERRORS IN THIS… THAT’S HOW YOU KNOW IT’S ME!
Kanye shut the fuck up, why is your caps lock always on? I feel like he’s always yelling at me. Great episode, if you missed it watch it HERE. I especially loved how they got his crew on there:
Also, I’m curious… when do you think Kanye will finally come out of the closet?
A western Pennsylvania mother has been charged with giving her 13-year-old daughter drugs and alcohol so the woman’s boyfriend could get the girl pregnant, police said Thursday.
Shana Brown, 32, is no longer able to have children but wanted to have a baby with her current boyfriend, Duane Calloway, said Uniontown Police Det. Donald Gmitter. The pair decided to drug the girl so Calloway, 40, could have sex with her without her knowledge, he added.
“There’s some sick people on this case,” Gmitter said.
Brown has been charged with endangering the welfare of a child and was to turn herself into police later Thursday, Gmitter said. Brown’s attorney did not immediately return a call for comment.
Calloway faces several counts of attempted rape. He was arrested Wednesday and remains in Fayette County Jail. It was not immediately clear if he had an attorney
The three incidents occurred in Brown’s home in Uniontown, about 50 miles south of Pittsburgh, according to the criminal complaint.
The girl told police the plot was apparently hatched sometime in December after she rejected her mother’s proposal that she allow Calloway to impregnate her and then marry him.
In the following months, Calloway attempted to rape the girl three times, Gmitter said.
The first time, in February, the girl was alone with Calloway while her mother went out to buy pizza, according to the criminal complaint. Calloway began groping her and she kicked him away, the documents stated.
A few weeks later, the girl believes her mother spiked her Pepsi with rum, according to police. The girl told them she felt ill after drinking the Pepsi, passed out and later threw up. She was also partially naked when she woke up and Calloway was in the room, according to the criminal complaint.
The third incident occurred in mid-March, when the girl told police she came home early from school because she was not feeling well. She said her mother forced her to drink tea, and then she immediately fell asleep.
The girl said she pretended she was asleep until Calloway made a move, at which point she bolted upright and he left the room.
In a search of the Brown residence, police said they found an empty rum bottle, Tylenol PM and a pill crusher.
UMMMMM WHAT? I think I found my first candidate for Your Mom Should Have Swallowed You, congratz Shana Brown. This blows my mind, this is some next level, white trash shit.
Longest url ever but people who don’t get up for really old people, pregnant women and disabled people are disgusting. I personally like to document ridiculous things people wear on the subway or poster doodles such as this:
A boy who believed he’d impregnated his girlfriend at the age of 12 has been proven not to be a father by a DNA test.
Alfie Patten, now 13, took the test after six other teenagers came forward to claim they had also slept with Chantelle Steadman, the 15-year-old who gave birth to baby Maisie Roxanne last month.
The Daily Mirror reports the test has proven the infant is not Alfie’s — a finding that is likely to leave the boy devastated.
“I didn’t know about DNA tests before but mum explained it’s when they do a swab in your mouth and it tells if you’re the dad,” he was quoted as saying before undergoing the test.
“So if I have it, they can all shut up.”
“It had not even crossed Alfie’s mind whether Chantelle had not been faithful to him,” his mother Nicole said.
“He’s absolutely devastated that these lads say they slept with her.”
Since the birth, Alfie has been a doting father who can’t bear to be separated from his daughter, welfare workers say.
Matters were complicated when Tyler Barker, 14, and Richard Goodsell, 16, came forward with claims they had also slept with Chantelle and could have fathered the baby.
Since then, four more boys claiming they had slept with Chantelle have also come forward.
And a family friend has previously alleged Alfie was a victim of a scam devised by his girlfriend’s mother to cash in on publicity surrounding the young parents.
Teen mum Chantelle Steadman’s mother told her 15-year-old daughter to say Alfie Patten was the father of Maisie Roxanne, according to Clive Sim.
He claims Penny Steadman had told her daughter Chantelle to keep quiet about other boys she had slept with because “she knew Alfie being the dad makes a better story”.
“I think there’s a big scam going on here” he was quoted by the Daily Mail as saying.
Both Chantelle’s and Alfie’s parents are thought to have already earned thousands of dollars in media deals since The Sun broke the story.
Good hustle Penny Steadman, I only wish I had thought of it first.
JEALOUS!
PS. Alfie, don’t worry shorty. One day you’ll look back and feel like this man when you realize you dodged a huge bullet. Look at it this way, things with that cum dumpster would’ve never worked out anyway and you would’ve been paying child support out the ass for a kid that was never yours in the first place. Shiiiiit, at least you got $$$ out of it.
Attempt to ensnare boyfriend comes back to bite Indiana woman
Meet Michelle Owen. Concerned that an ex-boyfriend had used her laptop to search for child pornography, the Indiana woman asked police to search the computer for illegal images, but had her plan backfire when cops discovered two videos of her engaged in illicit acts with a dog. Owen, 24, was charged last week with two felony bestiality counts in connection with the video files, which a detective found in the laptop’s “recycle bin.” At the time Owen asked cops to search the computer, she was locked up in the Johnson County Jail on a public intoxication charge (which violated the terms of her release in a prior drunk driving case). According to a police affidavit, a copy of which you’ll find here, a cop told Owen that he had found videos of her on the laptop and asked if she “knew what those files might be.” Owen, pictured in the below mug shot, replied, “The one with the dog.” Cops believe that the dog in question, Toby, is a beagle. After asking if she was “going to be charged with this,” Owen said that the videos “were just something she did when she was drunk and barely remembers it,” adding that she tried to “delete them the next day when she was sober.”
A Florida Woman called 911 3 times, melting down over McNuggets.
A police report says 27-year-old Fort Pierce resident Latreasa L. Goodman told authorities she paid for a 10-piece last week but was later informed the restaurant had run out. A cashier told police she offered Goodman a larger portion of different food for the same price, but Goodman refused.
“This is an emergency. If I would have known they didn’t have McNuggets, I wouldn’t have given my money, and now she wants to give me a McDouble, but I don’t want one,” She later told the police.
She was cited on a misuse of 911 charge. A current phone listing for Goodman couldn’t be found.
A McDonald’s spokesman says Goodman should have been given a refund, and she’s being sent a gift card for a free meal.
-Yeah, if Wendy’s ran out of frosty I would be piss too. I’ll call the national guard to back that shit up.
Heath Campbell, left, with his wife Deborah and son Adolf Hitler, 3, pose in Easton, Pa. (AP Photo / December 16, 2008)
Police say three New Jersey siblings whose names have Nazi connotations have been placed in the custody of the state.
Holland Township Police Sgt. John Harris says he was there to keep order Tuesday when workers from the state Division of Youth and Family Services removed 3-year-old Adolf Hitler Campbell and his younger sisters, JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell.
Harris says DYFS did not tell police the reason the children were removed. DYFS spokeswoman Kate Bernyk says the child-welfare agency does not comment on specific cases.
The children and their parents, Heath and Deborah Campbell, received attention last month when a northwestern supermarket bakery refused to put Adolf Hitler Campbell’s name on a birthday cake.
THIS WEEK: WASTED CHICK AT 7PM IN THE HALF EMPTY BAR.
ERIN O SAYS: Since there’s no way in hell you could have remembered any of this, I’m going to fill you in on the complete ass you made of yourself in public. After some serious Christmas shopping (ok, not so much for others.), fellow McJawner Sally Sparks and my roommate and I were feeling a bit famished. We stopped at a nice bar/restaurant for some eats and a drink, but we had no idea that you would be providing the entertainment that night. Considering it was so early in the night, when we heard you scream louder than any person ever should indoors, we knew we were in for a treat at your expense/dignity. You proceeded to get even drunker for the next hour, calling the (HOT AND IRISH) bartender an asshole, then try to kiss his face, grab your equally hideous boyfriend’s junk in plain sight and be completely incapable of standing without the burden of gravity swaying your beer gut to the floor. Now I know how you got that thing.
Although I must say, four times is a record. Yes, you fell over four times in the five minutes your man-thing went to the bathroom. It was astonishing really. You couldn’t even look down to adjust your shirt without almost taking out all the bar stools. By the time he came back, you were cut off and threw a fit like a child who’s mom just told her no, she can’t have anymore Pop Tarts. I’m sure if you realized that there was only about thirty people in the whole place, maybe you wouldn’t have slammed your tongue down his throat so much. No one wants to see that. Especially when we’re eating.
For the rest of the holiday season, I suggest you take it easy. Honestly, at this rate, you’ll be in rehab by New Year’s. We don’t want to hang out with the girl who’s licking our face under the mistletoe and puking in the stockings. Cmon girl, be classy and stick with eggnog.
Three kittens with ear, neck and tail piercings were removed from a home by humane officers on Wednesday.
Wayne Harvey, SPCA kennel attendant, holds a kitten that was taken from a home in Ross Township on Wednesday. Don Carey/The Times Leader
One of the officers from the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals of Luzerne County said the pierced kittens were being sold as “gothic kittens” on an Internet auction site.
“This is a first,” said Officer Carol Morrison. “It’s unbelievable anybody would do this to kittens.”
Morrison said the investigation began about a week ago when a man from another state noticed “gothic kittens” being sold on eBay. The kittens were also being sold on a pet classified Web site with an attached picture of a pierced kitten.
“You’re not allowed to sell live animals on eBay,” Morrison said.
The man called the phone number that was listed with the kittens, and traveled to the home at 71 Dobson Road, where he saw the pierced kittens, Morrison said.
“He called us and explained what he saw,” Morrison said.
Morrison and two humane officers obtained a search warrant for the home from District Judge John Hasay in Shickshinny at about 3:30 p.m.
Assisted by the state police at Shickshinny, the humane officers traveled to the home located at the end of a long driveway in a remote area of Ross Township.
Humane officers and troopers were inside the home for more than an hour before removing three kittens and a cat just before 5:30 p.m.
“She (the homeowner) thought it was a great idea (to pierce kittens),” Morrison said.
Morrison said charges are likely to be filed against the homeowner.
A dog inside the home was also found with pierced ears, Morrison said.
Morrison said the homeowner has a pet grooming business in the basement of the residence. Several signs advertising “Pawside Parlor” were along Dobson Road and in front of the home.
The kittens also had submission rings placed in their tails, Morrison said, explaining that the rings would prevent blood flow, causing the tails to fall off.
The homeowner and a young girl were inside the home. After humane officers removed the kittens in cages, the window shades were closed and interior lights were turned off.
Morrison said the kittens will be checked by a veterinarian before deciding if the kittens will be placed for adoption.
I say we go to this bitch’s house, pierce her and prostitute her around marketing her as a goth whore, who’s with me?
When we charged them up in the newsroom, we found one of the $20 Blackberry phones contained more than 50 phone numbers for people connected with the McCain-Palin campaign, as well as hundreds of emails from early September until a few days after election night.
Private information at bargain prices. It was a high-tech flub at the McCain-Palin campaign headquarters in Arlington when Fox 5’s Investigative Reporter Tisha Thompson bought a Blackberry device containing confidential campaign information.
It started with a snippet we read on page A23 in Thursday’s Washington Post. The McCain-Palin campaign was going to sell its used office inventory at low prices.
But when we got there, it didn’t look like we were going to get much. It was lunchtime and most of the good stuff was gone, picked over by early birds looking for deals on file cabinets, white boards, sofas– anything headquarters could sell to get back some of their campaign dough.
We saw laptops ranging between $400 and $600 with logins like “WARROOM08.” We couldn’t log on without a password, but staffers assured us the hard drive would be zapped before it was sold, and the computer would probably work.
The hottest item? Blackberry phones at $20 a piece. There were only 10 left. All of the batteries had died. There were no chargers for sale. But people were snatching them up. So, we bought a couple.
And ended up with a lot more than we bargained for.
When we charged them up in the newsroom, we found one of the $20 Blackberry phones contained more than 50 phone numbers for people connected with the McCain-Palin campaign, as well as hundreds of emails from early September until a few days after election night.
We traced the Blackberry back to a staffer who worked for “Citizens for McCain,” a group of democrats who threw their support behind the Republican nominee. The emails contain an insider’s look at how grassroots operations work, full of scheduling questions and rallying cries for support.
But most of the numbers were private cell phones for campaign leaders, politicians, lobbyists and journalists.
We called some of the numbers.
“Somebody made a mistake,” one owner told us. “People’s numbers and addresses were supposed to be erased.”
“They should have wiped that stuff out,” another said. But he added, “Given the way the campaign was run, this is not a surprise.”
We called the McCain-Palin campaign, who says, “it was an unfortunate staff error and procedures are being put in place to ensure all information is secure.”
But we wonder– Did we get the only Blackberry with personal campaign information in it? Or did you get one too?
Elizabeth Frisinger, 18, lost her virginity on the beach during a senior class trip. Then she accidentally texted her dad, telling him about it. Woops! Gotta be careful with the iPhone texting app, Lizzy, it’s easy to text the wrong person. Seriously though, sweetheart, this could have been much worse. Just kidding — you’re totally fucked! It could have only been worse if, instead of texting your dad, he was there.
Honey you need to know who you are dealing with. I’m a very independent woman and I wont have ANY man play games with my head. I come home from my SECOND job last night only to find you piss drunk on the cheapest bottle of vodka you can find. (being drunk didn’t bother me so much) The way you acted was ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING.
Your from another state trying to make your way through school and have no home, so my family and friends take you in with open arms, because they care ABOUT ME…So in the process of moving you from one friends house, to a more perminate friends house, you FUCKING steal their frozen meat, and hot dogs. What are you INSANE????
You just took away their 2 year olds dinner for the next week. Not only that, but you totally burned down your bridges with any of my friends. Then you think it would be ok to bring the stolen food to my other friends who is giving you a room in her house. “NO” not ok, because now she is worried about her things being stolen. I actually SLEPT with my FUCKING PURSE last night. I really hope you know who your dealing with. I think you realized last night that I’m no pussy bitch who will let you walk all over them.
Now I have been bending over backwards to help your sorry ass. My friends have taken you in and this is how you repay them. I’m SO DISAPOINTED. I’ve lost respect for you. Oh and my brother just called he is highly fucking pissed that you left him a nasty message last night in your drunken stooper. IDIOT. Of course you don’t remember anything, but you still try to convince me that stealing the food was part of “survival” FUCK OFF. You have been eating DAMN good at my house. We even let you enjoy and healthy handful of snow crabs, so don’t fucking tell me it’s about survival.
Yesterday while on the bus, you hinted to the fact that maybe you were going to try and put your hands on me. You said “we’ll see how tough I am when we get off this bus” WELL I FUCKING DARE YOU. Luckily for you, your drunk retarded ass passed out on the bus. I should have just left you sleeping. You would have gotten a pleasant surprise when you woke up at the terminal with no phone, no money, no clue where the fuck you are, and certainly NO ME. Keep pushing me pus.
GOD I fucking love you, but you are pushing me away SOO damn quick, before you know it, I wont be there. That’s if I even decide to come down there tonight. I need a night out with the “Boys” That’s another thing I miss my male friends. NEVER did I sleep with ONE of my male friends, but I can’t have them, because your insecure. You can sleep alone TONIGHT. You and your crack head ways!! Only crack heads steal meat out of people’s freezers.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. The last line is the best part, ONLY CRACKHEADS STEAL MEAT OUT OF PEOPLE’S FREEZERS! This is my favorite missed connections ever. I don’t even know how this counts as a missed connection.
First of all — your≠you’re
Second, you will not be walked all over? REALLY? YOU’RE letting this loser continually mooch off you and your friends, while he steals frozen meat and talks shit to your brother. FAIL. I think the only thing this dude realizes is that he can continue treating you and everyone you know like shit and you will still support him. You slept with your purse after coming home tired after working two jobs (probably to support his broke ass) while he blacked out from drinking bankers. AND he’s threatening to beat you now??? WHO’S THE REAL LOSER?? Get your shit right lady! Instead of ranting on craigslist like it’s your livejournal, kick this scumfuck out. Stop the empty threats (you don’t scare anyone), stop finding him a place to mooch, stop feeding him, stop helping him out and move on with your life. I guess the sex must be mind blowing because I can’t think of any other reason why anyone would act this stupid.
Winter is just a few weeks away. Do you have the cuddle skills needed to escape the seemingly endless fog, rain, snow and endless supply of frat boys hitting on you in the bars? My cuddle instructional program will teach you the skills you need to find and keep quality men through your superior cuddling skills. Your new cuddle confidence will leave you beaming!
But wait…can’t you just go down to a Build a Bear Workshop and construct the perfect cuddle buddy to your exact specifications? No! My specialized program will turn you into an expert cuddler capable of holding any man. You will:
Learn the best clothing options for cuddling. Leave your denim jacket in the closet. The best yoga wear from lululemon also makes for excellent cuddle poses.
Recognize the various stages of a man losing all blood flow to an arm. Peach colored is good. Purple arms are bad. Discover new and improved ways to cuddle back! And more!
In my advanced courses we’ll cover the differences between snuggling and cuddling, optimal spooning behavior, and how to keep your hair out of his eyes and mouth.
Can you afford to spend another winter with bad cuddling skills? Tired of spending your nights alone with your stuffed animals and their missing eyes? Take charge of your cuddling life and send an e-mail today!
Act now and you will also receive exotic dark chocolate pairings and complex wines. My state-of-the-art cuddling facility features a fireplace, comfy couch, and plenty of movies. Hot chocolate and stove-top popcorn are also available.
Our lead instructor is 29 years old asian male and has studied cuddling under the tutelage of Zen monks for years. After mastering this craft he has decided to share his talents with others and make this world a warmer, more affectionate place. Toddlers cuddle naturally but somehow over the years we hesitate and grow shy. Past relationships can numb our senses but cuddling defrosts us slowly. Be at peace with the cuddle.
Admissions screenings will occur via e-mail with second-round admissions face-to-face over some good hot chocolate or wine. We realize you have a choice in fine cuddling institutions but appreciate your consideration.
Offer not valid for women who carry their dog in a purse or who believe winter means not shaving your legs for six months. Void in cities where evolution is banned from schools. Offer not valid for emo chicks. You won’t even need to take off your promise ring.
Act now! Send your application to the address on your screen along with a photo to kick off a new winter of expert cuddling!
———————————————————————————————– WHAT IS THIS FAGGOTRY? DUDE, GET REAL. Cuddling is the worst and should only be done if you’re really cold and need to steal body heat Spooning, on the other hand, is fine. Also, QUIT BEGGIN’.
“Please help! I took my husband’s i-phone and found a raunchy picture of him attached to an e-mail to a woman in his sent e-mail file (a Yahoo account). When I approached him about this (I think that he is cheating on me) he admitted that he took the picture but says that he never sent it to anyone. He claims that he went to the Genius Bar at the local Apple store and they told him that it is an i-phone glitch: that photos sometimes automatically attach themselves to an e-mail address and appear in the sent folder, even though no e-mail was ever sent. Has anyone ever heard of this happening? The future of my marriage depends on this answer!”
Clearly this is a problem that Apple will be looking into. I can’t tell you how many times my iPhone undressed me, took my n00dz and automatically emailed them out to my contacts! RIDICULOUS!!
Now that the 2008 election is over, reporters are spilling all the juiciest, and previously off the record, gossip from the campaign trail. Much of it is about the infighting between Palin and McCain’s staff.
However, perhaps one of the most astounding and previously unknown tidbits about Sarah Palin has to do with her already dubious grasp of geography. According to Fox News Chief Political Correspondent Carl Cameron, there was great concern within the McCain campaign that Palin lacked “a degree of knowledgeability necessary to be a running mate, a vice president, a heartbeat away from the presidency,” in part because she didn’t know which countries were in NAFTA, and she “didn’t understand that Africa was a continent, rather than a series, a country just in itself.”
Palin was apparently a nightmare for her campaign staff to deal with. She refused preparation help for her interview with Katie Couric and then blamed her staff, specifically Nicole Wallace, when the interview was panned as a disaster. After the Couric interview, Fox News reported, Palin turned nasty with her staff and began to accuse them of mishandling her. Palin would view press clippings of herself in the morning and throw “tantrums” over the negative coverage. There were times when she would be so nasty and angry that her staff was reduced to tears.
Thanks Fox News for not sharing that our could have been VP doesn’t even know the difference between a country and a continent until the election was over, real cool. It blows my mind that people actually VOTED for this dumb cunt.
Got Camel Toe?
On Tuesday, State Rep. Betty Brown caused a firestorm during House testimony on voter identification legislation when she said that Asian-Americans should change their names because they’re too hard to pronounce:
Remember the 13 year old father, Alfie Pattern? 
Meet Michelle Owen. Concerned that an ex-boyfriend had used her laptop to search for child pornography, the Indiana woman asked police to search the computer for illegal images, but had her plan backfire when cops discovered two videos of her engaged in illicit acts with a dog. Owen, 24, was charged last week with two felony bestiality counts in connection with the video files, which a detective found in the laptop’s “recycle bin.” At the time Owen asked cops to search the computer, she was locked up in the Johnson County Jail on a public intoxication charge (which violated the terms of her release in a prior drunk driving case). According to a 
I say we go to this bitch’s house, pierce her and prostitute her around marketing her as a goth whore, who’s with me?
Spooning, on the other hand, is fine. Also, QUIT BEGGIN’.
